anger management essay
Effective Strategies for Anger Management: A Comprehensive Guide
There are many reasons why people have difficulty keeping anger under control or in managing it effectively. Most people have learned ineffective strategies from their parents, grandparents, or other influential role models. They may also have learned from significant others – how to think or how to behave inappropriately, how to express through violence or how to handle in an inappropriate manner. In summary, it is often learned either consciously or unintentionally from non-constructive models or from an environment that is not safe. This can be seen from the fact that if you ask some parents if they would like to have the same rearing style as they had, most of them would say “No!” This would in no way guarantee you a positive childhood that does not have to do with any difficult or negative emotions, but these very negative or difficult emotions do not have to be very intense or prepared to lack enough skills to handle them.
The global statistics show that people are becoming more stressed as each day passes. High levels of education and professionalism have not helped allay anger and irritation. Aggression is also still prevalent in modern-day society. Anger is a natural response to feeling attacked, deceived, or being treated unfairly. Everyone gets angry sometimes; anger is no exception. However, when angry feelings become irrational, aggressive, frequent, they do not help the situation, interfere with personal effectiveness or personal well-being, and then it becomes necessary to do something about it. People often seek counseling or psychotherapy because negative consequences linked to unresolved anger are severe. Within a matter of months, problems can be solved, goals can be achieved, and life satisfaction enhanced.
Only when you understand what a problem is can you know how to deal with it effectively. Anger problems can result from various things. They can be a result of early parental relationships if domineering parents didn’t recognize and reward their child’s play and efforts to achieve autonomy. Today, this kind of problem is often considered manifesting an “oppositional defiance disorder” in a child and can have roots in both genes and parents’ use of corporal punishment. Substance abuse can also heighten the use of a violence cycle. Children who have grown up around domestic violence can learn aggressive behaviors themselves, even apart from any genetic predispositions. For many of us, angry feelings are triggered by relationship problems, leading to both verbal and physical violence. Anger can be a result of low self-esteem and depression. It is also noted that feelings of powerlessness result in more anger. Humiliating someone is one way to make them feel powerless. This is why society has to strive to encourage individual autonomy and to prevent the development of class vs. ethnic tensions. Our attributional biases, mostly making our partners’ negative behaviors seem internal and permanent when it is really external and temporary, cause the strong feelings of anger, not the provocation of that behavior per se.
B. The Cognitive Model of Anger: The cognitive model of anger seeks to help you readdress the balance. When we are angry, usually our thoughts are fueled by emotional, rather than rational, responses. The cognitive model is based on the belief that the way we see events influences the way we feel and behave. In other words, our feelings are produced by our thoughts. This model provides an explanation for how rational, anger-inducing thoughts can be mistaken. Anger may be intensified by a number of irrational beliefs, most importantly including the belief that the offender deserves to be punished, that other people’s behavior should comply with one’s own strict beliefs, and that when other people do not meet these standards, they are therefore ‘bad’ people.
A. Cognitive Restructuring: An essential aspect of anger management therapy is to help people develop strategies to reevaluate their thoughts, comparing the angry subjective interpretation with a more rational, balanced, and objective interpretation of the anger-inducing event. The most validated and central technique for achieving cognitive restructuring is cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT).
To control or minimize angry feelings, there are many strategies one can try. These have been set out in numerous books and taught in structured, widely available therapy programs. They include:
In many cases, poor communication is the cause of the buildup of tension and anger over the course of time. A specific situation arises when the communication breaks down and the subsequent response and reaction are inappropriate. Powerful, hurtful words can be exchanged with fierce and strong eye contact. Nonverbal communication, such as facial expressions and postures, can further complicate a situation. An unwillingness to listen and a disregard for the other person’s feelings can add fuel to the fire. Positive communication is also a two-way process. Being positive, having positively motivated thoughts, and having learned and practiced effective problem resolution techniques will help to bring to a conclusion negative, painful, unresolved feelings of anger. Those things that stimulate tension and feeling threatened, such as physical intimidation and mental incitement, are not so much a problem when there is good, balanced communication. Helping people to feel good about themselves and the more positive use of gestures and body language can markedly reduce stress and stop this process of self-depreciation. In the increasingly multicultural society that we live in, the skill of respectful, attentive communication can, of course, beneficially expand to other situations.
1. Practice Healthier Lifestyle Your anger is a direct result of any imbalances within your lifestyle. By managing the intricate balance in the different aspects of your life and by engaging in the activities that will keep your stress levels lower, you can effectively manage your anger. A diet that is nutritious will ensure your physical, as well as mental fitness and well-being. You must have enough sleep on a regular basis for the duration of a minimum of seven to eight hours. A significant factor in the control of stress levels is sleep deprivation. You need the opportunity to relax by enjoying several forms of relaxation. You must also learn to maintain an organized home, and you will greatly decrease your stress levels, thereby decreasing the potential for an explosion in anger.
While the strategies for immediate anger reduction are effective, the long-term strategies you use will greatly determine your success in controlling your anger. Some of these long-term strategies include living a healthy and balanced lifestyle, diffusing your accumulated anger regularly, getting regular exercise, and spending time developing your interests and hobbies. You can be better able to control your anger if you develop a strong network of support. This book provides an in-depth analysis of the various long-term strategies you can adopt to control your anger.
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